Good Morning!

I'm going to stop counting my days now.  I feel like I'm in AA or something.  I'm 16 days sober....blah blah blah.  A coworker stated the other day that he doesn't understand why people smoke.  I agreed...I don't understand why smokers smoke except that it's an addiction.  Why I started?  Because everyone else was smoking and I felt the need at that time to fit in with the people that I was around so we had something in common.  Sad case of followerism.  Yes, I just made up that word....followerism.  Its definition is as follows:  A person who habitually follows others in order to feel accepted.  lol  Well then as I grew older and realized that it just wasn't fun following, it was more fun to lead and fall on my face just so I could laugh it off.  That reminds me of a funny saying a friend of mine who was dabbling on both sides of the fence at the time.....ALWAYS FORWARD....NEVER STRAIGHT!  haahahahah

Today I will be headed over to my coworkers house for a cookout and some football.  More cookout than football for me.  I've tried getting into the sport, but the company I have been with during those times has been less than fun.  Maybe I'll enjoy watching it one day.  I'm making my Dill Potato Salad for the event and I haven't made it in so long I forgot what was in it besides potato and dill.  Sad, yes....but it's slowly coming back to me.  It should be a fun day with the kids and coworkers.  Maybe I'll post some pics tonight!

I forgot to post my dream from the night before.  I don't remember much from last night unfortunately which is a good thing.  Means I slept well.  The dream the night before was one that should be written for a movie if it hasn't already.  I was living in a city that looked a lot like NY, but very clean.  I had a best friend who's name was Emily and we would run through the city holding hands like there wasn't a care in the world.  I felt the innocence of the moments we had in my dream; the laughing, the running, the feel of the cobblestone beneath my feet as we walked through the allies.  This went on for what seemed to be a brief moment until we came upon a see through wall that showed us inside someones home.  A girl was sitting there in her chair scribbling on a piece of paper.  Emily and I looked at each other and Emily had a very quaint smile on her face as she took my hand and walked through the wall with me.  We walked up to the girl in the chair and she turned to look at us.  She had down-syndrome and was drawing our home on her piece of paper.  She introduced herself as Emily.  I looked over at my Emily and she faded away.  Then I woke up.
I'm going to take this dream as a sign never to judge a book by it's cover.  I wasn't raised with a thought of looking at others as not being equal, I was never put in a situation where I should feel that way.  I see it  happen a lot, I hear it happen a lot, heck it's happened to me my whole life even today I'm judged by others because of how I look, but I would never think of putting someone through the mental abuse that judging causes just because they look different.  I accept difference.  How boring of a place the world would be if we were all the same?